i have to admit, it turns out, i enjoy grey's anatomy. my apologies. for that among so many other things. i wrote alot of things today, after hours of whiskey and church and medical and funeral home-related drama, but it's nothing that should be repeated, at least not to everyone. I am trying so hard to start.
listen to 'right away, great captain'. God is the captain. do you get it?
i'll be sad when my dog dies
i feel no different for trying
“the gods put us down with a certain arbitrary glee in the wrong place – and what we seek is who we really ought to be, like Parcheesi which I don’t remember how to play.”
all i could think in church today (though im not supposed to call it church) is that so many times we do the right thing,we make the right choice, without any acknowledgment of why we do it, and it becomes so useless to do things "for God" because that wasn't our original intention, just a happy afterthought. I'm hoping that it turns out to really not be about me at all, because if that was the case, all i did was make a mess of it all.
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